The Lasting Impact of Childhood Trauma on Adult Relationships

By: Destiny Proulx-Kier, Intern Therapist

Created: February 14, 2025

Published: February 17, 2025

Early childhood trauma can have a significant and long-lasting impact on how people view and handle relationships as adults. After going through traumatic experiences, people may struggle with feelings of safety, avoidance, or hesitancy while establishing emotional bonds.

Attachment Styles and Their Development

How people approach relationships is greatly influenced by their attachment types. These styles can be divided into the following categories and are derived from early encounters with caregivers.

Secure Attachment- This is created when caregivers are dependable and responsive especially with emotional support. This fosters connections based on trust.

Anxious Attachment- This results from inconsistent caregiving. It results in individuals who seek closeness but also fear abandonment.

Dismissive-Avoidment Attachment- This forms when caregivers are emotionally unavailable. Overall causing an individual to be self-reliant, avoiding any emotional intimacy.

Fearful-Avoident Attachment- This is developed from experiences of abuse or neglect, leading to fear of both closeness and abandonment.

According to Heim et al. (2013), experiences of physical, emotional or psychological abuse within the family of origin creates a template for how individuals perceive themselves and others in intimate relationships later in life.

The Prevalence of Childhood Trauma

A variety of traumatic experiences, including physical assault, sexual abuse, natural catastrophes, the death of a loved one, and abandonment, are included in the category of childhood trauma. Understanding that trauma is a subjective phenomenon is crucial. This means that what is painful for one individual may not be for another.  It is seen that  “In the United States, more than two-thirds of children have experienced some form of trauma” (Lebow, 2021). Not only in the United States but, “Across the globe, 1 in 8 adults have reported childhood sexual abuse, and 1 in 4 have reported physical abuse” (Lebow, 2021). Such early experiences shape emotional bonds as Lebow (2021) explains childhood trauma can impact relationships due to individuals learning about emotional bonds so early in life. When people we depend on such as caregivers for survival hurt us or are not present, it impacts how we view human connection.

Healing and Moving Forward

Healing is possible even though childhood trauma presents difficulties. People can change their attachment styles and create healthier relationships in many different ways. To overcome the effects of previous trauma and create satisfying relationships an individual can pursue professional assistance, practice self-reflection, and create safe connections.

Understanding the roots of one's relational struggles and actively working towards healing can empower individuals to create secure and stronger connections in their adult lives.

References:

Lebow, H. I. (2021, June 10). How childhood trauma may affect adult relationships. Psych Central .https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-childhood-trauma-affects-adult-relationships#trauma-resolution

Heim CM, Mayberg HS, Mletzko T, Nemeroff CB, Pruessner JC. (2013). Decreased cortical representation of genital somatosensory field after childhood sexual abuse. The American Journal of Psychiatry. 2013;170(6):616–623.

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